Life is like High School
2007-08-18
Last week a musician wrote an email to the effect of, “I've been working hard - why isn't it paying off?”
Keep this in mind: life is like high school.
When you're in high school, it's ALL about popularity, clicks, being cool, what you wear, what parties you're at, etc.
When you go to college, the focus shifts to academic achievement.
Many people get out of college thinking the world will be like that. “The harder you work, the more you will be rewarded.” But it's not.
Life is like high school. It's all about who you know, how socially charming you are, what scene you're in, what you wear, what parties you're at, flirting, and being cool.
But you can make this work in your favor.
When I think about every big leap that happened in my career, it was always because of “someone I knew.” Always friends of friends. People in some position of power who I kept in touch with, did favors for, and got the same in return.
Go meet 3 people each week you think could help your career. Be a good friend. Make it mutually beneficial, not some suck-up relationship. There's always some resource you have that can totally help out someone who may be “above” you on the ladder. Invite a NEW friend to a party or show you know about.
For years I was booked solid, touring the college market, making way too much money, not because I'm GOOD, but because we made a FUN, ENTERTAINING, “COOL” show. We won the popularity contest.
I think it's possible to approach the music business as if you were a new kid going to a new high school, and wanted to be the most popular kid in class. Sounds shallow, but it works.
Ask Andy Warhol, or someone like Miles Davis - who made great music but knew how to play his image : to be cool.
I only recently found your blog, I love what I've read so far. (Hence trolling back to the early days.) There is so much quality in your archives!
This post is relevant to a conversation I was recently having re: government funded arts. (Especially grant committees made up of non-artists.)
Life is like high-school. I'll be hunting pretty girls to kiss, and trying not to get beat up by the thugs who wish they had the courage to talk to girls.
Cheers!
Hey... This a good post, Im working on life vs high school and this help me a lot.
Life is like high school. Chasing all the good moments with your friends and then they live you. That sucks!!!!!
Derek,
Your content is so kick ass! Seriously man.
I recently came to the same conclusion that you made in this article. I thought for years (like a fool) that I could shut myself off from the rest of the world and build a business by myself. I refused to network with other business people. Even after being in business for a decade, I was still making stupid mistakes that none of my peers who had survived that long in business were making. My peers were all crushing it with their businesses by that point. I was still struggling to make that transition from self-employment to actual business owner who runs a real self-sustaining company.
Eventually I came to the realization that it was my own refusal to network with other people and my refusal to rely on other people to help me that was holding me back.
You can't be afraid to get to know new people. If you just put yourself out there and have a pleasing personality, other people you connect with are going to want to help you to succeed.
When you get to know the right people, things start happening.
It's so true! Life is always about money! why can't everybody just live in peace and quiet and not because of that fucking money! they always care about that damn thing! urgh!
you are a cool dude. Seriously man!
You've made me realize that shutting my self out from the rest of the world makes me no better than a lonely sadist. Thanks man. You are really reaching out to people out there.